This one is going to be very difficult to get right! I suspect that nobody is going to be comfortable if your spouse makes the trip alone. More specifically, you may take up residence in the dog house for a potentially protracted period of time! Therefore you are going if the trip is on. That leaves the timing issue. I would pursue the Friday afternoon/evening arrival as the stated option is clearly ludicrous. If Friday afternoon/evening is not an option you have a not so simple go or no go decision! My conclusion would be no go but, I know nothing of the folks involved and their interpersonal relationships. No go is likely to send you to the dog house as well. Truly a thorny problem. I am also wondering what the motivation is behind not arriving before your friends. That does seem rather unseemly to me! I truly don't envy you the problem. I would suggest the only way to minimize unhappy folks is for you to go on the one basis which would likely result in you being the only unhappy camper. The old adage "if MOMA not happy, nobody happy" comes to mind.
Good Luck;
Vic
