Billyray,
You should be aware that there are no standards for the ubiquitous 12V mousehole. So, there are no "standard" sockets and no guaranteed to fit plugs to go in them. There is also no designed means to retain any plug. I could actually go on for a while longer about the things that are bad about them.
It sounds to me like you just ran into things that are incompatible.
I can't tell you what to do about it other than try other things. If the plug you are using delivers power and doesn't blow a fuse, you can sometimes get it to stay put by jamming a toothpick in there.
Matt
