Family - - - too little, too late

I figure if you say "I have to know by (date) because I have to make reservations" (I wouldn't make it more than three days away from the conversation). If they want to, they will respond. If they don't,it's their loss. Even more to the point, I just say (to friends as I don't deal with any of my Ex-hubbies kids) I will be HERE on this date. IF you want to meet up then great. If not, okay. You are not the center of anyone's universe except your own. I have friends who tried to put together a long over due family reunion at a location that was roughly equal driving distance for all. There was a campground AND hotel room and cottages (Unicoi State Park/Resort in GA) so all budgets would have been covered. The response was virtually nil. They even went to the expense to mail out a questionnaire to find out budgets, foods wanted, activities, etc. No one responded except to say "why don't you just come here" Here being FL and that meant adding 250 to 300 more miles to a two of the others trips (and one was pretty sure they couldn't get time off from work). Since the bulk of the family members were in FL nothing was done. My friends simply never bothered again. Every Christmas when they get the "why don't you come down for Christmas" they always say they can't afford it or they can't take the time off (and it's true). Seems the road only runs one way. Seems the road only runs one way for many others too.