I cannot even begin to know how you feel and how sad it must have been to have such uncaring at a sensitive time like that, Bless you for being so composed. Our Vet was an amazing man and his log time Office Manager(and eventually his wife) were like part of our family, because of him, I have become my family's designated paw holder for the trauma of having to let a suffering pet go. I feel death should not be cold and heartless, is should be loving and caring, a short voyage and someday a long and happy homecoming. I have held my daughter's cats in my arms and even a few of ours while Dr. Cartwright shaved their legs and inserted the needle of what we have termed the $45 shot(it is now closer to $100).
Dr. Cartwright was amazing in his calming effect on animals and I credit him with giving me part of his gift. I have never been bitten or scratched while holding a dying pet, I have never cried or felt remorse at the time, that always comes later.
I don't know how to say it but, please find one of the 99.9% of Vets who do their job out of love and caring both for the pet and for the ones holding them.
I'm sorry but it is now later and because I can no longer see the keyboard. It is again my time for tears in remembrance of those waiting for us.