extrovert/introvert
Once we retire (2yrs) we plan to take the 5er and travel to every nation park and many historic points around the country. This morning she expressed concern about leaving all her friends for such a l...
Forum Discussion
I totally understand where Mrs Goldwing is coming from. I'm a social person, but there's a difference between your true friends, and the people you meet and talk with while camping. To me, your true friends are almost like your family - and leaving them should not be taken lightly. Friends are valuable. It doesn't make sense to say "I'll just leave my (member of your family) because they'll be there when I get back and I'll find a new one along the way". Friends have a different level of value to different people, and you can't just tell her to go find new ones. One thing that keeps us in the "weekender" category is that our core social group is based at home. I'm not ready to say goodbye, but that's not saying that I never will. Life evolves. Right now I love getting away a little bit, and then coming back.
It does sound like they have different visions for what their golden years look like, and I don't know what to do about that. Clearly, some compromise on both parts is in order. I've seen other couples in that position - who thinks of discussing that when you're young and in love?
Mrs Goldwing does not need to feel guilty because her idea of a good life means grandkids, friends, etc. Mr Goldwing doesn't need to feel guilty because to him it doesn't. The key here is to not let the whole situation fester - get everything out in the open and start discussing solutions. There's one in there somewhere. Each party can have what they want (at least sometimes), and the other party needs to be happy for them and not use guilt as a tool. Each one may discover things they didn't know about themselves and what they want out of life. Or maybe they don't.
It does sound like they have different visions for what their golden years look like, and I don't know what to do about that. Clearly, some compromise on both parts is in order. I've seen other couples in that position - who thinks of discussing that when you're young and in love?
Mrs Goldwing does not need to feel guilty because her idea of a good life means grandkids, friends, etc. Mr Goldwing doesn't need to feel guilty because to him it doesn't. The key here is to not let the whole situation fester - get everything out in the open and start discussing solutions. There's one in there somewhere. Each party can have what they want (at least sometimes), and the other party needs to be happy for them and not use guilt as a tool. Each one may discover things they didn't know about themselves and what they want out of life. Or maybe they don't.