PROBLEM SOLVED
Dealer installed and setup a 12K Reese Strait Line Dual Cam and it tows great. The design of the Strait Line that works to keep the TT and TV inline at all times sold me and works as described. The loss of steering and light feeling in the front both gone. It recovers from bounce better then the Equalizer I towed with for years. As for the Blue Ox, I think the match of a long TT and a shorter stout TV kept this from working for my setup. Yes the Reese is more complicated to setup but I can see what's happening and understand the hitch. Much more adjustable too.
Thanks again for all the input