Ooooohh... you'll probably get a lot of varied replies!
We pull a Lance 1685 with our 2006 Toyota 4 Runner, rated at 5,000 lbs - but the truck has factory towing with extra transmission cooler as well as a Fastway E2 weight distribution hitch.
The Lance 1685 is 3800 lbs DRY weight and we figure when loaded for extended camping (months at a time) it's around 5,000 lbs. We do not travel with anything in the tanks except for a bit of emergency water. We looked at the R-Pods and liked them except there wasn't enough storage in our estimation for long trips.
Whatever you decide, yes, you do need an extra 1000 plus pounds for stuff, so 4,000 lbs dry weight is probably maxing it out.
While we tow with the 4 Runner, if we had a different truck, it might be safer. If we were getting a new truck (you mentioned thinking about getting a new Traverse), I'd be looking at other trucks. Or staying with a smaller lighter trailer.
For more on our 10,000 plus miles of experience towing the Lance 1685 with our 4 Runner, here's my blog post...
Towing a Travel Trailer with a 6 Cyl Toyota 4 Runner
