I feel for all of you in the crowded east and mid-west.
Campgrounds in CA are highly used as well. During summer months there are very poor odds that you can just drive in and find a spot. So when we camp during the peak months, we plan ahead and get reservations. I miss the old days, but whatcha gonna do.
Reservations can take the spontaneity out of camping, so when we have to we choose from the thousands of dispersed camping locations we have within a few hours drive. But that isn't without problems too, because the peak months are also among the hot months, and I just won't camp somewhere that I would have to run AC all day.
So most of our camping is before school starts, and after school resumes in the fall. I'll be in the Sierra's for 2 weeks in early October, and I will have my choice of campsites. No competition on the trout stream. Got another week in November, but even in CA the mountains will be cold, and trout season will be closed, so we'll probably do something in the desert that week. So many options that I don't really have to give it much forethought. Might even just drive and decide along the way.
Think about that, next time you are tempted to post derogatory remarks about good old California.
The truth though, is that no matter where you live, you just have to be more creative with your camping, and find ways to avoid the crowds. Or maybe learn to be more tolerant of your fellow campers. Being different than you does not make them trash.