You have to figure out what you want. Hard side, soft side we have had both. Liked both and now have a Outfitter. We have used ours in below zero weather a number of times and soft sides are no problem.
We have an Outfitter shortbed because every inch counts. Out in the middle of the desert, what difference does it make. But a few campers going though the woods just a few inches taller us will clear the brush or give a good marker for where we might get into trouble.
Cassette toilets are popular, we have a dump at home so its not a big issue for us. You have a Class A and are up to speed on dumping. We also carry a blue sewage tank.
As far as stealthy camping, with a popup, we have been all over the east coast, In downtown DC they have no idea what a popup camper is, and with the roof lifted they don't have a clue. Its a problem for those who know truck campers because they know, but rest of the world is numb, funner than a crutch.
We have only been run off one time from a parking spot in over 9 years.
BTW, being from Colorado, take a look at TC's on the road. Its an interesting mix. To me there are a surprisingly large number of popup TC.
As far as the weight goes, if you built your jeep, you can deal with the weight.
Good luck.