I have a 2016 Explorer Sport as my daily driver. I have around 50,000 miles on it. Other than normal maintenance stuff, I have had no problems with it and it's really fun to drive. I've only towed a utility trailer with it though.
BUT, it will be tight with 4 kids. The third row is small. I don't use it, as I have dogs instead of kids, so it stays folded down for a large cargo area. Be sure you look at a Sport or Platinum for the 3.5 Eco-Boost. The XLT and Limited only have the non EB 3.5 and I believe their towing capacity is lower. Also when I was shopping, I found pre-2016 models did not all have the towing package, it was an extra option. Also you will need to watch your payload very carefully, especially with 4 kids. You may not be able to tow a trailer and have the whole family in there at once. My payload is something around 1250lbs I believe.
I had a Pathfinder as a rental before. It was lower end of course, and it was total garbage. I have no input on the Durango other than I think they have a nice appearance.
ETA: One note on the 3.5 EB engine, it really does do better with Premium gas. So that's something to consider. Also I'm not sure you can find a 2 year old used Sport or Platinum (to get the EB engine) for 25k or under, unless it has super high miles. But there isn't much difference between a 2016 like mine, and a 2019. So don't lock yourself into the 2 year old thing.