you can get to southern Utah and then up to Salt Lake and over to San Francisco without much in the way of scary roads.
Go from TX up through Albuquerque and take 550 up to Durango CO and then west on 160 to 191 and up to I 70.
Then up to I 80 at Salt Lake.... OR...
take highway 50 across NV to 395 and go north to I 80 on it, then on over to Frisco.
Coming back, your best bet is to take I 90 out of Seattle. An interstate is never more than 6 % grade..designed for big trucks, etc. Stay on 90 down to Bozeman MT and take 191 south to Yellowstone.
When you leave Yellowstone, go out the east gate to Cody, and here is your one, real challenge because there is no way across the BigHorn Mts without grades. You have to go around them if you want to avoid it.
Northeast to Billings and then down I 25 and I 90 east from Buffalo WY or south east to Casper and then east and over to Lusk and then north to Newcastle and highway 16 east over to Custer SD.