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reddog24
Explorer
Explorer
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67 REPLIES 67

Hondavalk
Explorer II
Explorer II
First off way are so many people assuming the DH is a crappy driver. I don't know many people that haven't had a bone head moment driving. New coach, lots of distractions, long day, we don't know what really happened. In 40 years of riding motorcycles I've had two crashes that were a whole lot worse than being bounced around the back of a motor home. Get back on your horse and try and relax. On the other hand if your DH is a terrible driver maybe you should drive. Good luck

lizzie
Explorer
Explorer
It is tough to make an investment in something you don't feel comfortable using. I did it with a truck camper of all things! There were so many things I loved about it but it gave me major anxiety about 75% of the time. There are some good suggestions here. First take it to a parking lot or something and practice. Try short trips. If it just doesn't work, cut your losses and find something else. Life is too short to worry about "things" and you want to enjoy RV'ing. Best of luck. lizzie

Terryallan
Explorer II
Explorer II
It appears that not only were did this time scare you, but he has sacred you before. Does he have a habit of running off the road? After all, it is no harder to keep a bus on the road than it is to keep a full size pickup truck on the road.

If he does have a habit of running off the road. It may well be that you would need to do the driving. Or rethink the whole thing. If he scares you on a regular basis. You will never feel safe with him.
Terry & Shay
Coachman Apex 288BH.
2013 F150 XLT Off Road
5.0, 3.73
Lazy Campers

JEBar
Explorer
Explorer
to come to grips with such traumatic experiences takes time, practice (meaning working at it), and a strong desire to do so .... the suggestions to take shorter trips over wider roads and build up over time are good ones

Jim
'07 Freightliner Sportchassis
'06 SunnyBrook 34BWKS

coolbreeze01
Explorer
Explorer
I used to teach driving big rigs. Some folks never get it. Good luck.
2008 Ram 3500 With a Really Strong Tractor Motor...........
LB, SRW, 4X4, 6-Speed Auto, 3.73, Prodigy P3, Blue Ox Sway Pro........
2014 Sandsport 26FBSL

robbiesgram
Explorer
Explorer
First thing I would do it make sure I was doing all of the driving, not the DH. He sounds like my ex, scariest driver ever. If you are behind the wheel, you will be in control of the rig, how fast you are driving and so on.

If it were me, I would just to out and sit in the drivers seat to get accustomed to the big windows, take all the time you need. Then if you can't go to an RV driving school, go to a big empty parking lot and practice a lot as mentioned earlier, learn to back up, stay in your lane, any other kind of driving your feel uncomfortable with. Take as much time as you need, if anyone tries to make you hurry up, tell them to take a hike. You need time to be comfortable with a new rig.

Moving up to a bigger rig is scary at first, especially from a C to an A with that huge window, but if you are in control/driving each trip will get much easier until you get to the point you will wonder why you were scared to drive.

If you don't want to drive, always sit in the passenger seat, belted in, that way you can anticipate problems early and prepare for them. I'll bet that the unexpected manuver is what scared you more than anything.

Take care, you will enjoy the RV alot in time.

DutchmenSport
Explorer
Explorer
reddog24,

You have experienced a trauma, and the fact is, you may NEVER completely over come it. Years ago, when I was 16, I had an encounter on my motorcycle. The motorcycle when one direction (right into the corn field), and I went the other way, right down the middle of the road! Between lots of skins, road tar that tatooed into my skin forever. I was able to ride the motorcycle home with twisted handle bars, a severely leaking gas tank, and blood gushing from every spot of my body. A trip to that old man that delivered me at birth taught me a lesson by washing those wounds with alcohol and scrubbie, and NO I was not under any sedation. He did that to teach me a lesson. He despised motorcycles and wanted to put me in enough pain I'd never ride again..... WRONG! I did!

Why did I tell you this story? Because every time after that I attempted to get on another motorcycle, I had a real bad case of "nerves" and the closest sit-down bathroom was all I could do! Oh, I rode again, but the "nerves" thing is something I never got over. Funny, I quit riding completely at age 29, and even today, just to look at a motorcycle make me have to "go!" (if you know what I mean!).

Will you ever overcome your emotional trauma? Maybe not! And if not, I think that's OK too. You'll just have to accept your limitation now, and look for a different method. Perhaps you will never be able to drive again. You may even get to the point where you are not even able to enter the motor home without having panic attacks. If this happens, you'll just have to change your life style.

I'm sorry this happened to you, but you don't need to beat yourself up any more feeling bad. Just accept your new limitation and look for an alternative way to be happy! It might mean changing RV's or even going to a -truck-trailer combination, or give up the RV life style completely. Only you can answer that. But it's REALLY OK, and you'll eventually be OK too once you find your 'way'!

EDIT... I'm sorry, drinking alcohol NEVER solved any problems! Hiding a root cause by smothering it with alcohol will only turn you into an alcoholic. Now you'll be a traumatized alcoholic. Alcohol is NOT the answer! AND there definitely is no smiley after this sentence!

dalehelman
Explorer
Explorer
Just take several short drives. That will help you rebuild confidence. In time you will be able to relax and enjoy your new RV again.
Dale & Sandi
2015 Jeep Grand Cherokee Overland
2015 Little Guy T@B Sofitel
Liberty Lake (Spokane) WA.

DIY Manual replacement for Workhorse Auto Park emergency brake.

Stay In Play Duo Toad Braking System

pianotuna
Nomad III
Nomad III
Hi reddog24,

Go for a drive to an empty parking lot. Take along some cones, and practise lots. Start at 5 mph. You will be fine--just as you were in the 21 foot. It will take a bit of time, that's all. (We believe in you!)
Regards, Don
My ride is a 28 foot Class C, 256 watts solar, 556 amp-hours of Telcom jars, 3000 watt Magnum hybrid inverter, Sola Basic Autoformer, Microair Easy Start.

RVUSA
Explorer
Explorer
Steve S wrote:
WOW you guys are a tough crowd! She's asking for advice so she's not afraid and not having anxiety attacks.

K my best advice is to hit the bottle, I find drinking hard and heavy helps to deal with many problems like the ones you're facing.
I hope this helps!


When you fail to add the smiley, your post reads as serious advice. Are you seriously suggesting they drink and drive? And that you also drink and drive in order to handle this kind of situation in case it arises?

:B

Francesca_Knowl
Explorer
Explorer
I'm not understanding the Original Post- were you belted in the passenger seat or somewhere in the back of the RV?

If the latter:

You probably wouldn't fear riding in the cab of a pickup just because you got tossed around riding in the pickup's bed- you just wouldn't ride back in the bed anymore....right?

Try thinking of this the same way- just don't get out of the seatbelt unless the rig's not moving, at least for now.

Good luck!
" Not every mind that wanders is lost. " With apologies to J.R.R. Tolkien

okiejoe
Explorer
Explorer
What you might try is adding a steering stabilizer shock system and just remember if your tire drops off the pavement back off on the throttle don't brake, get control (your first reaction is going to be to jerk it back on the road) just get control and continue going straight and gently easy it back on the road. Many peoples first reaction is to panic and jerk it back onto road and hit the brakes this causes many problems. Braking adds more weight shifted to front tires which make it harder to control tire in the dirt. One other key thing to do is don't stare 2 to 3 cars in front of you, you need to look as far ahead as possible, what this does is keep you centered in the lane, its when you only look ahead just a few cares or even a few hundred feet you will find you will drive to one side or the other. Find some real good wide road and drive it a lot to get used to it, don't give up, you will gain your confidence. One more thing I would do is add some really good shocks to it to reduce any rocking or swaying. There are some very good systems to improve the steering it just takes some research.

loulou57
Explorer
Explorer
Take it out again on small trips and increase the time, miles and the amount of traffic until you are at ease. It will happen.

I was in a head on accident in the snow/ice. We actually were almost stopped. We saw the car coming but had nowhere to go. Traffic on the left and snow bsnk on the right. It was an awful feeling watching that car coming faster towards us. Anyway, it took a while but I now am ok being in a car in the snow.

Don't give up your dreams or your RV. Obviously, your hubby corrected thing, straightened out and drove home safely.

Go out and enjoy.

GaryWT
Explorer
Explorer
Slightly confused, did you end up on your back or you were in the back? I say sit in the front, less movement and a better seatbelt. Also if you see things then you can be ready for them.
ME '63, DW 64, (DS 89 tents on his own, DD 92 not so much), DS 95
2013 Premier Bullet 31 BHPR 2014 F350 Crew Cab 6.2L 3.73

Crowe
Explorer
Explorer
Practice, practice, practice, close to home. What I found very helpful is the use of industrial parks that have roads. You may have to contact the owner of the property for permission but that gives a little more "real life" to the driving. Not sure there's an RV school up here in the northeast but maybe a tractor-trailer driving school can help. It took some time for me to get used to our Endura when we had it but like anything you just keep at it.

I may not have gone where I intended to go, but I think I have ended up where I needed to be

Douglas Adams

[purple]RV-less for now but our spirits are still on the open road. [/purple]