Having done fostering for years, both with an organization and on my own, I will tell you that it is very difficult to "know" which homes will be a good home for a particular animal. Because most rescues use volunteers, and volunteers are very hard to come by, it is very difficult to staff the organization with people who have the ability to pick a good home every time. Some groups/volunteers are about how many can we place today; others are about only adopting to a "forever home".
I've had people swear to me up and down that they will do all the right things for the animal if I let them adopt it. I've had them yell and scream at me when I tell them no. But, I have to go with my gut feelings and hope that I have made the right decision for the animal. Some of my choices (good and bad):
Husky/shepherd mix who had a husky brain. Woman wanted to adopt her. She would take the dog out for a walk along the river twice a day and she worked from home. Sounds like a perfect home - EXCEPT that this dog needed constant mental stimulation. If she got bored for one second, she was shredding a bag of candles all over the couch, or chewing up a boat, or jumping the fence, or jumping out the open window, etc. I refused the woman who was furious - until I asked her "so, I adopt the dog to you, and you're first full day together, you take her out for a nice long walk along the river, you come back inside and go into your study to work, 5 minutes later you come out to get a cup of coffee and your couch is shredded. What will you do?" She was aghast that this dog would do something like that and suddenly wanted nothing to do with her. The dog went to a different home - they took her to agility classes and set up a course in the backyard, they did non-snow sledding with her, and she still managed to throw them a curve ball every few days.
I had a very nice older female cat. She was extremely timid and nervous. Before I fostered her, she had been staying at a pet store adoption center full-time. Someone had taken her out at an event with all sorts of noises going on and she escaped. It took about an hour to get her back (with many scratches on my arms). Several months later, I brought her back for an adoption. A woman really liked her and we spoke that day and the following week at length about her timidity. I made it very clear that she would hide for several months before she got used to the new home and to not push her. The woman made the promises very easily. I had a niggling doubt, but convinced myself I was just sorry to see the cat go. She picked her up on a Sunday afternoon. On Monday morning at 8 a.m., her boyfriend dumped her at the store. The store called me and I came to pick her up. She smelled of fear so horribly that the stench was noticeable from over 5 feet away. The people had apparently chased her the entire night to keep her from hiding anywhere. The poor cat tried to hide in the kitchen cupboards she was so distraught. I was so beside myself with guilt for not foreseeing this, that I immediately adopted her myself and she never left my house again.
I had a very nice litter of kittens who had been rescued from a uncontrolled breeding home. They were very sweet kittens, but lacked the civilized manners. Even at 5 months, they used their claws for everything - including climbing up your leg. A very nice old man and his son wanted to adopt one. The man was in his 80s and had very very fragile skin. I explained to the son that these kittens were not right for him due to the scratching and pointed out several kittens which would be wonderful for his dad. The son was furious with me because his dad wanted THIS kitten and I should be grateful that it was getting a home. I explained that any gratefulness I felt would be shortlived when the cat climbed up his father's leg and ripped it apart and the son brought the cat back screaming about how horrid it was that I adopted a monster to his fragile dad.
There are many other examples where a perfectly good home is not the right home. Yes, it is frustrating to try to adopt an animal only to be turned away. But think about it from the other side: you have made a commitment to find this animal a good home. You send the little thing on its way only to find that it was mistreated, tortured, neglected, dumped, or returned. The guilt you feel for failing to protect that animal is so overwhelming that you do whatever you can to ever prevent it from happening again. For me, I learned that I will never ignore my doubts about a home again no matter how small. It may piss people off, but I'd rather piss you off than fail another animal.
