I take the guess work out of the truck side by using one of these 7-way TEST PLugs. These are available from etrailer where I got mine but I think the local auto parts store will carry them as well...
I carry this in my RV tool box. If it turns on the proper LEDs on the adapter on the truck side when plugged into the 7-wat trailer connector then the problem is on the trailer side.
I also spray WD-40 into the trailer connector everytime I use it. I will squirt some WD40 into the the 7-way connector then plug in the trailer plug and move it around good a few times then lock in place.
My 2010 Ford trailer connector is only active when I have my ignition key turned on. Trying to measure the spade lugs with my multimeter was awkward for me to do so I just picked up one of the adapters to test it. It plugs right in and i can look at all lights modes at the same time.
Roy Ken