Tequila make sure these stories are not spawned near the "X Villages"
There is a stretch of coast there about 30-miles in length that is tierra indigena. A land set aside for indians. They are cranky, carry rifles and when the fit hits them they block Mex 200 until the feds arrive. They rant and rave in half nuathal and broken spanish about local injustices and police corruption.
If someone had asked them if they were martian they would have answered "Si!"
Simply respond "NO COMPRENDO" and point at the windshield hologram. Been there done this a half-dozen times and it works like a charm. I asked one anciano who spoke a little Spanish -- "None of them have bullets".
In the RV park in Playa Azul I came across one trailer tower who had embellished his version into a commendable novela. He and his group were sitting behind me swilling margaritas by the dozen. As I finished my chilaquiles and arose, I wished them Buen Provecho, then said "It sounds like you had quite a time in the rig behind me. Gotta get hearing aids as I am deaf to gunfire". Dead dead dead silence.
