Useless Park Reviews
I'm planning to spend the summer in the Pacific Northwest (PNW) and I've been reading a lot of camp reviews lately. Most are so horrible, they make my head spin. Here's a hypothetical example of Camp Anywhere, a fictional campground with an average rating of 3 stars.
Camp Anywhere, USA - 1 star:
This it the worst park I've ever stayed in. The gal at the front desk is incredibly rude and hates dog owners. My dog Spike is the sweetest pit bull in the entire nation and doesn't weigh anymore than 89.5 pounds. The rude lady at the front insisted that I get my dog weighed at the pet smart across the street when Spike growled at her. He was only growling because he sensed how rude she was. I know they have a 90 pound dog limit, but that's ridiculous. Total discrimination.
As if that wasn't bad enough, the pool Nazi made life hell for us and our twin 4 year old boys. She kept telling them to stop running and jumping in the pool. How ridiculous. My boys are only 4 years old. They can barely run and how much harm could they possibly do even if they ran at full speed? They never jumped into the pool. They may have entered quickly, but I wouldn't call that jumping. Management has a terrible attitude and the bathrooms are filthy.
The park itself is full of self-righteous people who hate kids. Someone complained to management about my boys being too loud and playing by themselves outside. For crying out loud, what am I supposed to do with two young boys with ADHD? Do they expect me to keep them inside a small trailer all day?
The park WIFI was horrible. My wife and I couldn't stream two movies on Netflix without interrupting our file sharing service on the server we run. When I complained, they told me there was nothing they could do about it.
The sites are super tight and there are trees everywhere. You would think that management has figured out that people need lots of room for their RVs and would tear down these trees or at least prune back all the branches. I couldn't get my satellite TV to work and had to use their crappy cable TV.
The laundry room was worse than useless. They charge $1.50 for laundry and $1.00 for drying. That's highway robbery and I've reported them to the state board of consumer affairs. These people should be ashamed of themselves. In addition to the theft of our money, the laundry machines were always full. We had to wait for our laundry because we were afraid someone would steal our clothes. But the one time we left to go grocery shopping, someone took our laundry out of the machine and left it in a basket. How rude.
At the end of our planned two month stay, they asked us to leave. They told us the park was full and we should have reserved more time. I told them that I need to stay another week because we had no other place booked. They could not have cared any less about our situation. They had no problems putting out my family with my two boys with no place to go.
Anyway, I was glad to leave that disgusting place. I could hardly sleep at night with the super loud freight train passing within inches of my window and the jet liners flying directly overhead. On the plus side, this place is convenient to downtown and has easy highway access.
Camp Anywhere, USA - 5 stars:
My wife and I love this park. It is beautiful and filled with shade trees. The people here are friendly and respectful. They have strict rules, but I like it that way. I didn't use the bathrooms or laundry because I have those in my coach, but when I walked by, they seemed fine. The internet was a little slow but it was fine for my use. When we wanted to stream a movie, we used my MIFI card from Verizon. It worked great.
The heated pool was nice and relaxing. The best part about this park is the fantastic access to downtown and the friendly advice of the managers. We loved staying here and enjoyed all the local attractions. We would definitely stay here again.
Camp Anywhere, USA - 1 star:
This it the worst park I've ever stayed in. The gal at the front desk is incredibly rude and hates dog owners. My dog Spike is the sweetest pit bull in the entire nation and doesn't weigh anymore than 89.5 pounds. The rude lady at the front insisted that I get my dog weighed at the pet smart across the street when Spike growled at her. He was only growling because he sensed how rude she was. I know they have a 90 pound dog limit, but that's ridiculous. Total discrimination.
As if that wasn't bad enough, the pool Nazi made life hell for us and our twin 4 year old boys. She kept telling them to stop running and jumping in the pool. How ridiculous. My boys are only 4 years old. They can barely run and how much harm could they possibly do even if they ran at full speed? They never jumped into the pool. They may have entered quickly, but I wouldn't call that jumping. Management has a terrible attitude and the bathrooms are filthy.
The park itself is full of self-righteous people who hate kids. Someone complained to management about my boys being too loud and playing by themselves outside. For crying out loud, what am I supposed to do with two young boys with ADHD? Do they expect me to keep them inside a small trailer all day?
The park WIFI was horrible. My wife and I couldn't stream two movies on Netflix without interrupting our file sharing service on the server we run. When I complained, they told me there was nothing they could do about it.
The sites are super tight and there are trees everywhere. You would think that management has figured out that people need lots of room for their RVs and would tear down these trees or at least prune back all the branches. I couldn't get my satellite TV to work and had to use their crappy cable TV.
The laundry room was worse than useless. They charge $1.50 for laundry and $1.00 for drying. That's highway robbery and I've reported them to the state board of consumer affairs. These people should be ashamed of themselves. In addition to the theft of our money, the laundry machines were always full. We had to wait for our laundry because we were afraid someone would steal our clothes. But the one time we left to go grocery shopping, someone took our laundry out of the machine and left it in a basket. How rude.
At the end of our planned two month stay, they asked us to leave. They told us the park was full and we should have reserved more time. I told them that I need to stay another week because we had no other place booked. They could not have cared any less about our situation. They had no problems putting out my family with my two boys with no place to go.
Anyway, I was glad to leave that disgusting place. I could hardly sleep at night with the super loud freight train passing within inches of my window and the jet liners flying directly overhead. On the plus side, this place is convenient to downtown and has easy highway access.
Camp Anywhere, USA - 5 stars:
My wife and I love this park. It is beautiful and filled with shade trees. The people here are friendly and respectful. They have strict rules, but I like it that way. I didn't use the bathrooms or laundry because I have those in my coach, but when I walked by, they seemed fine. The internet was a little slow but it was fine for my use. When we wanted to stream a movie, we used my MIFI card from Verizon. It worked great.
The heated pool was nice and relaxing. The best part about this park is the fantastic access to downtown and the friendly advice of the managers. We loved staying here and enjoyed all the local attractions. We would definitely stay here again.
