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Ro646a's avatar
Ro646a
Explorer II
Nov 01, 2013

I decided to sell our motor home

Several months ago I noted that my wife had unexpectedly passed away, and that I would probably not be taking part in any of the discussions here for awhile. As it turns out I only took our RV out for one short trip this summer, with my brother and his wife. It just wasn't the same without my Lois riding with me, so I decided to sell the motor home and move on. I was fortunately able to sell it in less than a week on Craigslist, for my asking price.

I wish once again to thank those of you who offered advice and support over the past 7 years. I wish all of you the best.

Traveling in our motor homes was the most fun we ever had together, and I will always treasure the wonderful memories we made, and all the nice people we met in our travels. Don't put off that special trip you plan for too long. You never know when your life will change forever.

10 Replies

  • I can only hope that I'll never experience that sudden loss, but know how it can effect you. I lost my wife of 27 years last year, but it wasn't sudden at all. Her health was getting worse for 17 of those years and we always joked that I couldn't go first.

    When her time came, the obvious choice was hospice care at home. The hospice service was unbelievably good. We fought to keep her alive, but of course, failed. The male nurse she had during most of the last two months quit before she died. I think he took it hard when he realized we couldn't beat the odds. He was just as positive as we were.

    The HUGE difference is that it gave me a lot of time to prepare. Very deep inside, I knew I didn't have a snowball's chance of saving her, but I tried. When she died, I was praying for her suffering to end...and I'm not religious.

    The last month was awful in ways I'll never be able to describe. She never saw me cry. I had to be strong and positive. If I knew I was going to lose it, I'd go to the kitchen where she couldn't see me. She wasn't afraid of death. She was afraid of what it would do to me. I'm crying now just thinking about it.

    I was beyond devastated when she died, for an hour or two. I'd never watched someone die, let alone my wife. She was my life for half of my lifetime. Then it hit me. Her pain was over and I had to get on with life now. I know me and I'm the type who'd never move on if I didn't do it then.

    I met another woman quickly and remarried. I changed nothing else in my life. The parallels between the previous wife (I'll never refer to her as my ex. It sounds like divorce.) and my current wife are in the thousands, including the same first name. My current wife knows exactly who my previous wife was and how similar they are. They don't look the same or act the same, but the attributes and ancestry are very similar. The one striking difference is that my current wife has no health problems.

    I knew my previous wife had problems going in. She'd had health problems since she was 15. I didn't care. She was an amazing woman. My current wife is also amazing in her own way. I've never known anyone to compare her to.

    The one advantage I had was knowing it was coming. If I'd lost my previous wife suddenly, I don't have a clue what I'd do. I would try to suck it up and be strong, but that's got to be hard to do. I'd want to try to regain a normal life, but I can imagine that would be extremely difficult.

    Good luck to you and try to stay strong. Do what it is what is best for you and what she would want you to do. I can certainly understand where a motorhome would be tough to use after all the shared memories. Good luck to you and your future. It will get better. You'll never not miss her, but you have to try to live the rest of your life like she's guiding you.
  • Sorry for your loss,I lost my wife several years ago just after her 34th birthday.
    Wanting to spend more quailty time with my kids we discovered camping.first a tent,then popup,TT, etc.I cherish the time I spent with my kids when they were young.My youngest just graduated high school this year. They still talk about some of our more memorable trips and talk as if it was just yesterday.

    Luckily the lord blessed me with a second wife that enjoys rving as much as I do and now I've got grandkids that just cant wait for another trip in papaws bus.

    I know its tough but concentrate on the good times you had and the pain and hurt will turn into a cherished memory that will always bring a smile to your face.
  • My family sends our deepest condolences for your loss. Please take care and we are praying for you and your family. Tommy
  • So sorry for your loss. Cherish the memories and she will always be with you.
  • that's really sad ...I wish I could think of something to say that would help you but I don't think anything but time will
  • Sorry for your loss. Glad you got out of the coach what you wanted.
  • Please accept our prayers and condolences for your loss. As time passes life will be easier, but I know right now it's difficult. There are few pleasures in life greater than traveling with someone you love and cherish. Remember the memories, laugh at the good times and also keep in mind there are still people that care about you. While you no longer have your coach, visit us from time to time and let us know how you're doing.....Dennis
  • Only "advice" I can give ya partner is DONT. Dont get rid of the coach....just find a different co-pilot! And old (male) buddy thats maybe??..retired or whatever so he can be free to roam. How about a female...either never married or a widow or ?? that would love to see the USA but cant / wont / isnt able to do the RV thing herself ( alone)

    The VOID you feel with the loss of the wife cant be healed....cant be filled...but you CAN "drive around " it.!
  • I am sorry, not only for your loss, but that you decided to sell the motorhome. We are already living fulltime in our 5th wheel and we have not retired yet. I don't see me doing or living anywhere else.

    Just remember, you get old when you stop doing things, so get up and find something else to do with your life. Don't just stop living. She would not want that.