Getting waste to flow up into a waste tote.

I have the 42 gallon Barker unit and depending on my camp location I have a similar issue. I usually lay the dump hose on the top of the tote to support it and just open the black tank valve. Like you I have to manipulate the hose to get it to dump into the tote but usually only at the end of the dump. I only need to dump the black tank if we stay a week or more but I do use it for both black and gray tank dumps. Moving the tote to the truck to hook up to the hitch is a non issue unlike some suggestions here. I've never had an issue moving it. What I have discovered is that you really should use a bungee cord and tie the tote tow arm to the hitch. There is risk that the tote will come off the hitch and only tow the tote less than 5 mph otherwise you will burn up the plastic bushings in the wheels. The last one I bought I bought the heavy duty version with steel bushings in the wheels instead of plastic.