Executive wrote:
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You can retire to California where...
1. You make over $250,000 and you still can't afford to buy a house.
2. The fastest part of your commute is going down your driveway.
3. You know how to eat an artichoke.
4. You drive your rented Mercedes to your neighborhood block party.
5. When someone asks you how far something is, you tell them how long it will take to get there rather than how many miles away it is.
6. The 4 seasons are: Fire, Flood, Mud, and Drought.
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Oooooorrrrrr .... you can retire in the "other part" of California, where ...
1. The commute doesn't matter cuz you're retired.
2. Ya can look out your windows mornings to redwood trees, out your windows evenings to beautiful sunsets, and out your windows all day long to your orchard that's still putting out apples in February.
3. Ya never look out your windows to snow that needs to be shoveled.
4. The winter temps are rarely below 40.
5. The summer temps are rarely above 85.
6. The little country store two miles away has everything ya need, the same checkout clerk has checked you out for at least 15 years, and has known you and your kids' names for at least that long.
7. The eight seasons: Are some blue skys, are some white clouds, are some fog, are some rain, are some wind, are no smog to speak of, have no mosquitoes, and never have humidity numbers higher than the temperature numbers.
8. Ya know how to eat salmon one evening and crab the next.
9. Ya property taxes are way low and stay that way cuz of Prop. 13.
Well .... maybe it's best that one about to retire should be careful to not judge a state by only it's Lower Half. ;)
