You have some answers to what might be your problem, so having said that, I hate toad wiring mods and diodes in particular, so unless you have a JK series Wrangler and use a COOLTECH plug and play wiring harness, my favorite install for many toads and SUV types in particular, is to make up a light bar or install lights on a hitch haul for the toad's receiver and just plug into that, keeping the wiring completely separate. You can even use your existing trailer connector for it as well, when not under tow for a few more lights back there. You'll also still have your regular brake lighting when towed using a supplemental braking system and for when the toad's brake pedal is depressed.