Let me take a shot at this. The tongue weight as a percentage of total trailer weight (dry or loaded) is not a hard number that the manufacturer designs in. The dry weight and it's corresponding tongue weight percentage IS fixed by the manufacturer. This is done by the position of the trailer wheels, the placement of all of the load on the frame, including the frame. This is the part that is engineered in. When you start adding your stuff, if you put things forward of the trailer wheels you are adding to the tongue weight; behind, you are subtracting. It isn't an even amount, since the trailer is a lever (see-saw) balanced on the axles. So if you put something heavy only a foot from the axles, you may add only a little to the tongue weight. Conversely, if you put something heavy all the way to the front of the trailer, you will add more to the tongue weight. The reverse is true of weight being added to the back.
If you assume that you load your trailer evenly, with all the weight equally distributed front-to-back, then the tongue weight percentage should be the same as for the dry trailer.
The max receiver load for the truck is determined by the manufacturer and is based on a lot of calculations.
The weight of *anything* that is applied to the receiver has to count against the maximum receiver weight.
Did I get it right, Ron?