We are also from Hudson Valley and have gone to Florida for about 8 years now.
We have done 81 and we have done 95. Last year we did route 81 and that was longer, scenic, LOTS of trucks which were well behaved but the rest areas were clogged with them nights and a lot of the time (we left in Jan and returned in April). I thought it was a bit long. We went via route 209 (which by the way is kind of slow going).
When we do route 95, we often elect to go through the Balt/Wash area late at night so that it is less congested...think serious traffic with lot of cars merging (and most of them never look until it is rather late in the game, then they scurry like ants to get out of our way).
If we do route 95 we time it so we overnight in the welcome center to Virginia. Route 81, we have used the walmarts to stay the night (and shop). Welcome centers are our preference over rest areas.
Both ways have their merits and unpleasantries.
Donna