I must admit that this thread is a good deal more entertaining than the occasional "gun" threads that appear from time to time.
That said, the various "systems" can be so darn confusing, at times.
Let's see:
Meters - well, they're like skeeters - pesky at times.
Miles - they're like smiles - 'cause when the wheels on our "B" turn on any given day, well, that's a good day.
Kilometers, or KM - does that stand for "kick me", or if it's only a "K", well, isn't that a strikeout?
Kilogram, or KG - is that anything like KY - either the state or the jelly?
Then there's ounce. So how much is a "pinch" in the context of a recipe?
But, a year is a year 'til it's a leap year.
Is a centimeter anything like a centipede?
Gallon - well that was usually about seven pumps on the pump handle on the well.
And how much is an hour - well that's how long it took to walk home from school if I stopped at the pond to check on the frogs.
Now how much is a kilogram. I'm told it's about 2.2 pounds. Well my paternal grandmother was known as "Gram" to us, so does that mean if there is one kilogram, that one has 2.2 grandmothers?
Of course, a ton is a lot. But whether it's 2,000 pounds - that's a lot of money in the UK; or 2,240 pounds, and that's even more money; or 900 plus kilograms - and that's way to many grandmothers - well, a ton is a lot. And I know I can't pick up a ton. It's to heavy.
Metric schmetric, SAE who knows, old customary - that's more like it, and others.
But, maybe the measurement system I like best is the one I grew up with - before computers, air conditioners, TVs, cell phones - well, let's just say life was much simpler and slower.
Two examples.
First, when I was a wee lad, we lived in a town of about 2,500 folks and the telephone system was "old style". No dial tone, no private phone conversations. If you wanted to make a call, we were taught to pick up a phone, the operator would come on the line - "Number please?" - and since, as youngsters, we didn't know other folks' phone numbers yet, we were taught to simply ask "May I speak with my mommy please?" (If you didn't say please, well, we'd hear about THAT at supper), and the operator, knowing our voice and who we were without our giving our name and also knowing where everyone in the community was at any given time (and with whom) would simply connect us to the phone where our mother was at the moment, and, voila, our mother would come on the line. 'Twas like magic, and it worked every time. No metric, no SAE, no "system", just simply asking to speak with our mother.
Or, when a stranger would come to the community and ask directions to, say, the Johnson house, well it'd usually go something like this.
Let's see, go down this way (pointing in the appropriate direction) to Pete's mailbox, turn left and go down aways to the big oak, turn left again and go down to the old Smith property, turn right and it's just over the rise. The locals knew exactly what the directions meant, the visitor, well I s'pose they're still looking for the Johnson house.
So, we had our own measurement systems - maybe we could call it the "southern system". To heck with all those gummint mandated systems. Our system worked flawlessly. Length (or distance), weights, time - they worked great.
So, at least for now, the sun rises in the east and sets in the west. At least until some gummint dictates that the four points of the compass will no longer be used and a new cockamamie system is introduced, at which time I, for one, will revert to the "old ways". I.e., the sun rises "over there" or "thataway"; and sets "over there".
Ah, the "good old days".
Cheers.
