Forum Discussion
toedtoes
Sep 02, 2018Explorer III
Thanks. I have learned two things about forums:
1. When you post a question, you're going to get answers you don't like; and
2. When you respond to a question, your post may not be liked.
I try to offer a solution that I think is practical and let the OP decide if it is useful to them. I may be off in left field for what they really want, but it is given in good will. I think most of us fall under this.
Trying not to make lifestyle judgments goes a long way in remaining civil. When the lifestyle is inherent in the question, it is difficult to impossible. When the lifestyle is mentioned but not a major factor, then it is easier. But some have a hard time with this - if it is mentioned it must be judged. And those applauding the lifestyle are really just as bad because it has no bearing on the question either way and it does not need defending - just a simple "that doesn't matter, get back to the question". Defending will always bring out the offense.
And there are always a few who will comment on everything BUT the question. My sibling did this with everything - she'd be told to clean her room and she would color code her socks, hang pictures, darn a sweater, take apart a clock to see how it ticks... anything but what she was asked to do. It's a disorder and it follows us into the internet with people who will rhapsodize about the color of your sewer hose rather than help you decide on the right length.
1. When you post a question, you're going to get answers you don't like; and
2. When you respond to a question, your post may not be liked.
I try to offer a solution that I think is practical and let the OP decide if it is useful to them. I may be off in left field for what they really want, but it is given in good will. I think most of us fall under this.
Trying not to make lifestyle judgments goes a long way in remaining civil. When the lifestyle is inherent in the question, it is difficult to impossible. When the lifestyle is mentioned but not a major factor, then it is easier. But some have a hard time with this - if it is mentioned it must be judged. And those applauding the lifestyle are really just as bad because it has no bearing on the question either way and it does not need defending - just a simple "that doesn't matter, get back to the question". Defending will always bring out the offense.
And there are always a few who will comment on everything BUT the question. My sibling did this with everything - she'd be told to clean her room and she would color code her socks, hang pictures, darn a sweater, take apart a clock to see how it ticks... anything but what she was asked to do. It's a disorder and it follows us into the internet with people who will rhapsodize about the color of your sewer hose rather than help you decide on the right length.
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