funny stories

We have a saying in our family: It's not a vacation until someone goes to the ER. :S I don't know if I can even remember them all.

*There was the first camping trip. Around 5am, my 3 year old woke up crying. He is mentally handicapped and autistic, so I figured he was just out of his routine and couldn't soothe himself. I took him outside the tent to calm down(and not wake the other kids). DH decided to build a fire for me. A big fire. A great big fire. The wind was blowing about 20mph and that fire was blowing sideways. Now, to his credit, DH didn't know squat about camping or camp fires. While he was thrashing around trying to dampen the fire, he tripped over the fire grate and flayed his leg open. Off to the ER for stitches and a tetanus shot.

*There was the time DH set up a hammock on a hillside. He was swinging in the hammock and one end cut loose, throwing him head first into an oak tree. He fractured his skull and had a wicked concussion. Off to the ER.

*Then there was the time DH got altitude sickness at the Grand Canyon. Off to the ER...again...

Various others of us have suffered corneal abrasions, pneumonia, burst eardrum, dehydration, broken arm, head injuries, lacerations, falls out of trees and off a 15ft cliff. Oh, and there was the rollover with 5 of us in the car...off to the ER...

Are we having fun yet? :R

As backstory, I sleep like the dead and if awoken tend to be somewhat delirious/confused (apparently my brother is the same way, so maybe it's genetic). I really don't like napping because I wake up so disoriented. Anyway, between my freshman and sophomore years of college, my best friend and I took a five week road trip from Ohio to a bunch of national parks in the western US with a cheap tent and my little 1988 Pontiac Sunbird. One night in Yellowstone there was a severe thunderstorm right overhead that was capable of waking me up. I heard rushing/pouring water and was convinced there was a bear peeing outside the tent. I woke my friend and kept telling her "there's a BEAR outside! It's peeing next to our tent!!" and made her get up, find her flashlight and tell me what time it was (3am) - no clue why i needed that info. Took me a while to regain my senses and convince myself it was more likely rainwater pouring off the rainfly or tarp...

We were camping in the popup, snug in bed with our Flat Coated Retriever Beau on his bed on the other end. Well, Beau was scratching and the popup was shaking like crazy. All of a sudden it stops and there is a bit of a thud. DH asks for flashlight, looks at other end and no Beau. Well, go and open the door and there is the dog, with a look on his face like 'hey, what happened?'. We had not hooked the bungee on his bed end, and he fell out of the camper.

We had this happen, except it was my 5 year old son that fell out :) Luckily he wasn't hurt, just a little stunned. The bungees were done up though.

REZ DOGS

The Indian reservations here in Arizona have lots of dogs. Dogs at the gas stations… Dogs in the campground... Dogs along the road... Dogs in the yards... Dogs at the museums... The big surprise is that they look healthy and well-fed. They usually don’t have collars, but they are too friendly to be true strays. They will cautiously walk up for a pat on the head. They seem streetwise enough to avoid the traffic. We visited with a dog at the Hubble Trading Post and we are sure we saw the same dog a mile down the road fifteen minutes later. He knows the shortcuts. Here at the campground, a couple of dogs came to visit shortly after we pulled in.

Our area of Texas is a contrast of dog care. Most of the dogs along the road are mangy and malnourished, or buzzard food. I don’t know why many of the people bother to have dogs, or how they can live with themselves when they see their dog being eaten by the vultures along the road. It makes me ill just seeing it.

In our neighborhood, dogs live like royalty. Pete gets golf car rides twice a day, and has his own (plastic) swimming pool. Gretchen lives in the air conditioning, except when she is walked in her matching harness and leash. The other neighborhood dogs get similar indulgences.

I have heard that the Navajos think the rest of us are silly for pooping inside our houses and letting the dogs inside. I like indoor plumbing and the company of dogs, but I can understand their point. But what makes the rez dogs look much better than the typical Texas dog. Are they owned but not collared? Do the people make sure that they are fed and medicated? Do they drive slowly-enough to avoid hitting them?

Rural Texans could learn a little about respecting life.


Postscript-
The following morning, two dogs we had seen around the campground were waiting near the motorhome when I took our dogs out for a morning walk. They walked a short distance down the road and looked back at us. We followed. They led us in the same way out of the campground, through a hotel parking lot, around the corner, down a side street to a construction site, where the workers apparently feed the dogs. We said our goodbyes and returned to the campground, and the rez dogs entered the worksite.

After a lot of thought, I am convinced that our dogs, being guests on the reservation, were invited to breakfast.

Matt Bruner 10/something/07 100 Klicks from Hopiland

We were camping in the popup, snug in bed with our Flat Coated Retriever Beau on his bed on the other end. Well, Beau was scratching and the popup was shaking like crazy. All of a sudden it stops and there is a bit of a thud. DH asks for flashlight, looks at other end and no Beau. Well, go and open the door and there is the dog, with a look on his face like 'hey, what happened?'. We had not hooked the bungee on his bed end, and he fell out of the camper.

Sure do miss ole Beau, he was a great friend.

On edit - here is a picture of Beau camping somewhere in NY in 2007. Imagine how sad he looked at the door after falling out of the camper

We were pop-up camping in Northern Minnesota (long time ago before the RV). The campground host warned us about a 500# sow & her two cubs that raided the campground dumpsters the night before about 2am. Nervously we (wife and two pre-teen kids) went to bed. Kids sharing the bed on one end of the pop-up, wife and I in the other.

I woke with a start when something pushed the camper. Thunk. I didn't hear anything but worried it could be the sow as we did have hamburgers for supper. A few minutes later....another push against the camper. I was getting worried now as the bear was right outside looking for a way into our pop-up. The only defense I had was the 2" blade on my Leatherman. I held that in my hand just waiting. Then I hear her... the growl. Right outside of my window. Now, fully awake, I planned it would be best to stab a paw ripping through our fabric with my knife rather than waiting for her to get inside. But.. it was quiet.. quiet the rest of the night until about 6:45am when it started getting light. My wife wanted to know why I was awake and holding the Leatherman. I told her the story about the sow and the two thumps. She smiled and called across the pop-up to my daughter and asked her to roll over in bed.... Thump. That is what I heard, my daughter thumping as she turned! But, what about the growl. I definitely heard the growl.... "Honey, that was the man in the next site - he was snoring".

I felt kinda stupid with the Leatherman. I got my hug for "protecting" the family and they still laugh about it more than a decade later!

(This is why we love camping... the stories, I have a ton of them!)