Be forewarned this is longish, I mostly am using this as a place to document my numbers and hopefully it helps someone!
Well I never managed to get to a scale and have the time to try out various hitch arrangements. So last trip out I tweaked the angle on the hitch and packed the trailer with a lot more to the rear. I also put nothing in the truck other than wife and 3 kids. Here are the new scale numbers (last year's numbers in brackets):
Front axle: 3102 lbs (2882)
Rear axle: 3762 lbs (4158)
Trailer: 5830 lbs (5302)
Truck Specs from door plate
FAWR: 3275
RAWR: 4128
GVWR: 7300
Max Payload: 1463
That makes the as delivered curb weight = 5837
Trailer dry weight = 4600 lbs
So with 6864 lbs on the truck that means we had 1027 lbs in the truck. I've calculated that I have 490 lbs of people and car seats, I estimate about 125 lbs of fuel at the time. That means the tongue weight was only 412 lbs.
The trailer was not handling near as well as before and was getting some sway which I am not used to as it never did that before. Clearly I had loaded too much to the rear of the trailer. So I moved some stuff around at the next stop and things settled down nicely. I would rather have done it right at the scale and got new numbers, but alas the kids were losing it by this point ;)
At least now I am transferring some weight to the front of the truck which I wasn't before. I still really need to get out to a scale and have the time to muck around without the kids.