hitch doesn't fit

If you forced it down with the latch in the closesd postion, you may have damaged it severely. That is the only thing that keeps the hitch secure so make sure it's working. I would get under it and use a bright light to verify it's OK.
If anything looks bent, DONT USE IT.
You will have to get a welder to come out and replace it. (Or have ot towed with a flatbed)

There are different styles of latches. With the type below, you have to lift and slide the latch back and let it lock open. After the hitch is on the ball, you release it and it should close and lock. Never force or hammer on a coupler. It should go on easily (which may include moving the vehicle forward or backwards a few inches). If it doesn't, forcing it is likely to bend or break something which would make it unsafe to use.

Sounds like your coupler did not release. You need to lift the little lever up on the trailer coupler before lowering on the ball. If it doesn't rest in place, the trailer lever did not release the "jaw" inside the coupler. 2 5/16 inch ball is the right size. I just check the Coachmen Web site:

PDF click here.

and you have the correct ball. I think the jaws inside the coupler are sticking.

Sometimes (rare, but it does happen), the jaws will close shut before the trailer is on the ball. I have to rise the tongue and that usually is enough to free it up from being stuck.

is there a lever on top to move/lock the ball in place, when down, a piece slides under ball.
bumpy

#1. How did you get the trailer home?
#2. How come the dealer didn't go over this with you?