Our route through there is I-195 to Providence, then I-95 to Old Lyme CT, CT 9 to Middletown then 66/I-691 to I-84. They just finished rebuilding I-84 through Waterbury and Danbury, so if you've been avoiding it, it's better now.
From there you have a couple of choices. You can stay on I-84 all the way to Scranton to pick up I-81 or take US209 down the Delaware Water Gap and pick up I-80 to I-81.
The roads around the NYC metro area are pretty dismal. The new Tappan Zee bridge is great, but the roads to it are still 3 lane and very crowded.
Jerry & Jeanne
1996 Safari Sahara 3530 - 'White Tiger'
CAT 3126/Allison 6 speed/Magnum Chassis
2014 Equinox AWD / Blue Ox