Richardwise, One legged camping

[Tom_Diane]

Hi Richard, As I was catching up on posts I came across your post late so I started the new thread. How are you getting along?
I was struck by one of your comments that your wife thought it best if you just stayed out of the way and you really wanted to help!
I feel where your coming from. I have severe COPD and last summer the pulmonary Dr told me to stop working around the house and to stop work altogether! As he put it, I have reached a stage where any exertion can really take a toll on me. I had 2 lobes of my right lung removed in 2010 I am on o2 24/7! I have a vasculitus that destroyed the lungs and damaged the kidneys as well as the sinus's! The wife and kids tell me to stay out of the way a lot these days and its hard when you are a hands on person! I had my sons put up a new garden shed last July on my B'day and all I wanted to do was help but they are head strong and wouldn't listen to my advice for laying the grade for it and it took most of the day for them to level the base. I could have done it in less than an hour! GRRR! I did try to help to take down the old shed and got a board dropped on my arm and because of the prednisone I take, it ripped a good piece of my skin back and I bled like a stuck hog! They told me again to go into the house or go to the garage so I wouldn't get hurt. My wife also advised me to stay out of the way! I am a 58 year old man, and to have to be told to get out of the way hurts, by your own kids no less, although they were only looking out for me!
I fought back the tears trying to explain to my wife why I wanted to be involved!
You have the right idea, Go camping! The lady up the street, when I told her of my situation, she asked why I didn't head to the camp ground just 5 miles away and we normally spend most of the summer there anyway. It was hard for me to not be at home when there is work to be done. Its in my DNA, when I was working on the railroad, I was a self starter and could work on my own or as a team member!
I just want to say that if you are told to stay clear, its meant only for your protection and not to belittle or to degrade!
I still hate it that my wife does most of the heavy lifting around here but she could call any one of our 4 boys and they would come running but its hard to ask when its something that you, in an earlier time could do yourself!
I think your wife is a lot like mine, she will do what she can so I let her and she knows that I am there if push comes to shove I will manage and then rest for awhile! GOOD LUCK! I hope that my late response finds you well and happy!
Just a P.S., I've had a broken back, later stage 4 colon cancer and beat it I think! I have diabetes and struggle with my sugars, as well as this vasculitus! Who would have thought 5 little words were so hard to hear(Stay out of the way!)

[D_E_Bishop]

I'm only 74 1/2 and I have been forbidden from getting on the roofs of both the S&B and the MoHo. In fact my 14 year old GD yells at me if I do anything to the MoHo but drive it. I feel 99% recovered from the radiation treatment for prostate cancer and 100% from the hip and knees replacement. I've been in the building trades since I was 14 and now all I can do is vacuum and cleanup behind the craftsmen. At least I'm 12 feet taller than was projected.

My new hobby is building LED strip light fixtures to replace all those da== halogen puck lights I installed years ago.

[Jaybird]

Thank you BSINMICH for your response
jb

[bsinmich]

Some C paps will run on 12V. It may take 2 batteries to make it all night. If you are using an inverter keep in mind that they also use some power.

[Jaybird]

To jump onto this thread, not to hijack it...

Is there a way to rig a CPAP machine to run all night on coach battery and not use the generator as most parks have quiet hours?

[Dog_Folks]

Wow. He is disabled and a super type A personality!!!

Sounds like having the camper in a seasonal situation is working out well, and that is good.

I wish you the best of luck.

[Chock_Full_o__N]

I am the wife. My DH has been fully disabled with stage 4 lung & heart disease for about 10 years. He's only 58 and he looks like the picture of health, so it really bothers him that he can't do the things he'd like to do. He feels ashamed, I think. Although I am perfectly capable of setting up the TT and doing all the connections, DH will drag himself around, huffing and puffing, to beat me to it. When I ask him not to, he says he doesn't want the neighbors to think he's a slug just letting his wife do everything.

He's the same way at home. We have a little yard that I can cut with my electric mower in less than 15 min. But I have to do it while he is napping or out on an errand because if he's home, he will literally walk behind me every inch of the lawn. Sometimes he will even wrest the mower out of my hands and try to push it, but he fatigues after only a few yards. Sometimes he has to sit down on the grass right then & there! And then he is wiped out for the rest of the day.

I must admit, I get frustrated when DH does this stuff. I hate it when he tries to do things that he knows is going to exhaust him or make him ill. I hate that he won't let me do the things that are hard for him to do. I hate that he can't handle his motorcycle anymore and that towing reduces him to a nervous wreck. And most of all, I hate the disease that has robbed us both of so much.

But I have nothing but love for my husband. Last April, we made the mutual decision to park the camper at our favorite campground up in the mountains and now we go visit it several times a year. We find that we no longer dread the whole process. Now we can just grab our clothes & the dog, and put a cooler in the Prius. We stop by a grocery store about 5 miles from the CG and load up. Then on to the CG and we're instantly camping!

[Dog_Folks]

Tom_Diane: I too am disabled, with a long litany of health problems. We travel full time.

Just this year, I gave up all the driving, even when towing the trailer, to my wife. She now does all the outside jobs, and I do the inside when setting up.

I went through some of the same things about getting out of the way as you have.

Your words tell me that you have NOT accepted the fact that you are disabled. I have been there. Once you accept it, things will get easier. It is what it is. Keep your focus on what you CAN do, not what you can no longer do.

For example, I have been a handy fellow my entire life. Now I physically cannot do most "fix it" projects. So, I have teamed up with my wife of 41 years. She provides the physical labor, while I guide her as to what needs to done and hand her tools. (She is actually proud that she now knows how to change out a toilet!! LOL) The job still gets done, "my way."

I can no longer hike in the woods. But it is amazing what a quiet ride in a golf cart, with binoculars, can reveal, for example. Seek out these activities and enjoy them. Let your kids help out.

Accept your present condition. It does not make you a bad person, but rather a person that is not letting problems,(Disabilities) hold him back. Carry on.