What Do You Wish Your Partner Had Done Before They Died?

[Chuck_Gail]

I am dying, and unlikely to see this Christmas. I can still do a little, and sometimes can persuade my brain to half work. So, for those who have had a partner die on them, what is the biggest issue you wish they had taken care of before they died?

I want to save my wife as much trouble as I can. I think I’ve done all the obvious things, but want to hear from those who have actually been through this. What have I probably forgotten? Comments please?

[emzee]

Thanks for sharing the post Sher.

Gail I am so sorry for your loss. You and your family are in my prayers.

[Emptypockets]

So sorry to hear that Chuck passed away - thanks for sharing.

[Nerraw_and_DW]

Chuck was a blessing to many people and will be remembered with each visit to this site. Heartfelt condolences to Gail and his family.

Our son's terminal cancer journey has taught me to live and love the best I can each day, because all of us are but a diagnosis away from the same journey. The ups and downs and hopes and fears, good days and bad days, pain and days of less pain, and finally resignation and embracing the spiritual journey. It's a courageous and lonely fight, since no loved one can walk the exact same path.

Grace and peace to all.

B.

[antiquedrose]

I am very moved by Chuck's post, he was a brave man with a lot of grace. I'm inspired to live and die with the spirit he and others (who are terminal and have posted here) demonstrate.

I hope Gail keeps posting on this site. Condolences to her and all of Chuck's family.

[CatandJim]

sher9570 wrote:

sher9570 wrote:
RIP Chuck...thanks for being a wonderful rv netter.

Sher

I have to re post here, a day or two ago I was reading a thread on the Travel Trailer forum named "Chuck" it was posted by a friend of chuck&gail...he has passed away and was put to rest on I believe the 18th or 19th.
That is why I came to this forum to post RIP to Chuck because sadly we have lost him.

Sher

Oh my.... I didn't know. May his family cherish his memory, until they meet again.

[CA_POPPY]

This was an amazing thread and Chuck must have been a special man, to be so ill and yet thinking of what he could do to help his loved ones "after." Bless his heart, I hope some of the suggestions were helpful to him. My heartfelt sympathies to Gail and family.

[punomatic]

I am so sorry to hear this news, but I admire you for caring so deeply for your wife.

Please make sure all of your beneficiary information on investments, life insurance, etc. is up to date. If you own any of these instruments in your name only, be sure to put them in your wife's name also. My dad left 11 life insurance policies, some of which showed he was the sole owner of the policy. That caused probate to be stretched out for two and a half years.

If you don't feel up to taking care of such things, please hire someone who can walk you through the process, perhaps a trusted attorney or your executor.

Write love letters to people you will leave behind, kids, grandkids, neices, nephews, etc. May God richly bless the time you have left with your wife.

[Ex-Tech]

Oh my, I am without words..................

[sher9570]

sher9570 wrote:
RIP Chuck...thanks for being a wonderful rv netter.

Sher

I have to re post here, a day or two ago I was reading a thread on the Travel Trailer forum named "Chuck" it was posted by a friend of chuck&gail...he has passed away and was put to rest on I believe the 18th or 19th.
That is why I came to this forum to post RIP to Chuck because sadly we have lost him.

Sher

[Ex-Tech]

Chuck, I have waited to find the right words to add to this thread so........

Although we have never met, you have become a dear friend over the years we have shared here in this Forum. I do believe you posted some wonderful words of encouragement when I shared about my daughter's passing four years ago.

I have no doubt where you will be spending Eternity so when you begin that journey, please give my daughter Jennifer a hug for me.

Hope to finally meet you there.

[CatandJim]

Everyone has given you some good advice. The planning is good but also the days of love that are left are precious, make the most of each one. Spoil & pamper each other.

My mom hid cards, notes & gifts in places where she knew it would take a while for us to find. Small things for everyone, her children, grandchildren and great grandchildren. It was so sweet to find them and somehow we were able to find something just when it was needed by the person it was meant for....

May the years you have shared together and the memories you have made be your loving legacy... until you meet again. You & your family will be in my thoughts & prayers. Joshua 1:9

[covetsthesun]

Chuck.. you have given a great gift to the RV family with this post. Tomorrow is not a certainty so all of us need "to get a move on" to enjoy our lives... tell others we love them every day. And have our legal doc's completed.

My Dad passed April 2009 after a lengthy illness... he had everything signed, documented and in a briefcase "ready to go". There were no questions about what Dad wanted or what needed to be done. That was a blessing.

The one thing we all didn't do enough of... is let the love flow freely. We were all so fearful of letting Dad go WE didn't LIVE and LOVE enough those last weeks. We squandered those living hours with fear...and denial that the end was near.

I think the best gift you could give your family right now is to let them all know it's ok. Let go of the fear... let go of the pain... there's time enough for the pain later... but... for right NOW... just let all the LOVE flow freely and fully.

Your wife needs the love you have left to give... YOU need the love your family is probably struggling with how to show.

I don't know if this helps... it's just my 2 cents worth. Know that you will be missed.

.. and as one poster said... if you figure out a way to communicate from the other side... let your loved ones know you are ok. I loved my Dad with a depth that I am still finding out about. He was my Hero... and my rock. After he passed.. I was heartbroken. But.. about a year later... he found a way to let me know he was ok... and it helped to heal my heart.

For you to ask us for comments on what to do... it is an honor to the RV family.

Much peace and love.

cts

[SpoiledRotten]

Best to your family.

[sher9570]

RIP Chuck...thanks for being a wonderful rv netter.

Sher