Anyone else not full timing because of the grand kids?

[ulvik]

Me and my wife have had RVs for years and always dreamed of fulltimimg around this beautiful country. But when the time came that we were able to we could not bring ourselves to do it.
Last year we gave it a trial run for three months and it about killed us because we missed our grand children soooo much. We had no other issues and loved the traveling but missing the little buggers was the only reason we don't think we could do it.
We tried our best to stay in touch by phone and Skype but the lack of a good hug was heartbreaking. Anyone else feel this same way and if you did go ahead and became fulltimers how on earth did you handle the pain of being away?

[happynow]

We are grateful RV travel provides an option to visit each of our childrens and grandkids homes regularly. We love to take the grandkids camping,fun times giving their parents a break too. Works well all around, great memories for when on the road.

[Scottiemom]

happynow wrote:
We have 6 grandchildren in 3 states, 1000 miles apart. We do a loop, spend extended time with each family between 2-6 month travels. We still miss them

We only have 2 states to cover, but this is what we do. Both our kids left Indiana for the east and south coasts. If we didn't fulltime, we would see them much less. Miss them. . . see them as often as we can.

Dale

[Campinghoss]

We don't plan on full timing however we do take extended month long trips. Fortunately for both of us, we share the same philosophy on grandkids. We raised ours and do not plan to raise anymore. We see ours from time to time and if their sport activities fall within the time frame we are available to go, we go.

I retired a few years ago at 59.5 and the DW retires within 36 months. At that time we do plan to take an extended across the country trip. Grandkids will not figure in the equation.

With that being said we do not judge those who feel differently. In a few years I will be in my 70's and while I feel good we plan to hit the road whenever we feel like it.

[2gypsies1]

We got downsized from our jobs in our early 50's. We were not going to sit at home so we took off... sold everything. Our grandson was 1 yr. old. Most definitely we missed him but we had many years of our life to live, too. We were there for all his milestones and often times inbetween. As other grandchildren came we kept the wheels moving to their homes or them to us so they could grow up with our lifestyle.

When we began full-timing we didn't have a cell phone or computer. We stood in a cold telephone booth to talk. We wrote letters and sent postcards from where we were. The kids still have them. We were there for their various graduations, including pre-school. We were there for grandparents day, special school plays or whatever. We were there for their important sports games/tournaments but certainly not every one. We were there for their birthdays and Christmas. We took their school project 'Flat Stanley' traveling with us and the kids were a hit in school when they could tell where all 'Flat Stanley' had traveled.

We took them in our RV to special places for vacation and they spent some vacations with us by flying to us in special places. Sometimes we would fly back individually for various occurrences. It wasn't always easy as many times we were thousands of miles away but we made the decision to live our life and to include them as much as possible. It definitely wasn't all about them.

Basically, they grew up with us full-timing. We have an excellent relationship with all of them. When we announced we were selling the RV they were truly disappointed. They looked forward to tales of our travels. All of us could not be any closer. They are teens and actually call or text us 'just because'. They didn't miss out on a thing because we weren't there all the time. They knew they could be loved from a distance, too.

It's funny, the 20-year-old first-born just returned from a 4-month solo backpacking/hostel trip to the eastern Europe countries. He sent us awesome photos and writings and he had terrific experiences. He even took a 5-day tour to North Korea! We were all very uneasy but knew him and trusted his instincts. When he returned in January we celebrated his Christmas. He brought back special small items for all of us including some sand from a beach where my great great grandparents lived in Poland. He honestly thanked us for his experience. He said he probably would never had thought of doing it had it not been for our traveling years and our desire to see new things.

Full-timing isn't for everyone but it can be done successfully with families staying intact.

[minnow]

Had a comment and thought better of it.

[Hamnet]

This seems to be the issue we have. More my wife than I. I retired early (58) to be able to travel since we haven't done much throughout the years. We are just starting to go for extended times. We have a 10 dayer in March and a 3 week in September. Next year hope to take a trip to Oregon/Washington/Canada. That will be the longest.
Because of the Grandkids, what I have decided is this. Lets say if the Canada trip works out next year. We get in the middle and miss the Grandkids but don't want to head home.
Park the rigs, fly home for a week or two. Fly back and continue the trip. It will of course be more costly, but everyone will be happy. That is my resolution if it comes to that.

[MarkTwain]

ulvik wrote:
I appreciate the input but first off we are not obsessed with our grand kids by any means and really only see them about once a week. We did not get to see our first two grandbabies but once a year due to my son was in the military stationed overseas. So we only got to see the oldest two once a year till they were 6 and 7. He moved close by us now and they just had the youngest grandbaby about a year 1.5 years ago. We are a very very small family and we all are very close. We all enjoy being with each other when we can but we do not impose or pry in any way. Was just curious how other people deal with the issue of family and to be honest some answers were disturbing but some were very informing and I thank you all.

One question, ask your self honestly, does the way you deal with issues of family allow you to have all the RV experiences that you have dreamed and planned for? To what degree are your RV experiences and plans altered????? Just a question?

[MarkTwain]

theoldwizard1 wrote:
I can't even convince my wife to make an extended trip because she wants to be home, "just in case" she is needed to babysit 1 or more of the 5 grandchildren !

I would call your wife's choice a "MAS FECA" choice or " HORRAY FOR ME, I GOT MINE, HOW ARE YOU DOING"???

[MarkTwain]

janstey58 wrote:
We love our grandkids, and are evening raising our 16 year old grandson due to family issues, but once he flies the coupe we plan to travel FT. We just purchased our first DP MH for that purpose, and will be practice traveling for 2-3 years before selling the house. There will be no "abrogation that allowed others to make off with the proceeds of 28 years of scrimping and saving for a comfortable retirement" in our situation, kids we will spend it all the next 20+ years!! We will travel around the grandkids as much as possible, or Face Time to fill in the gaps. For sure no more cold winters in our future!!

Good for you! Could not agree with you more!

[MarkTwain]

theoldwizard1 wrote:
I can't even convince my wife to make an extended trip because she wants to be home, "just in case" she is needed to babysit 1 or more of the 5 grandchildren !

This sounds a great opportunity for you to do some SOLO RV adventures:)

[theoldwizard1]

I can't even convince my wife to make an extended trip because she wants to be home, "just in case" she is needed to babysit 1 or more of the 5 grandchildren !

[MarkTwain]

'Choose your choice, Love your choice"
More importantly, I think it is important that husbands, wives or significant partners should pick a choice that equally meets both of their needs/wants. Compromising on your plans or goals can lead to frustrations in the future. Other people cannot or should not tell you what your feelings are, only you can decide! Other people can only give you answers that agree or disagree with your feelings or choices. Only you can decide what your real feelings are!! Letting other people decide what is the right or wrong choice for you could be disastrous,

[janstey58]

We love our grandkids, and are even raising our 16 year old grandson due to family issues, but once he flies the coupe we plan to travel FT. We just purchased our first DP MH for that purpose, and will be practice traveling for 2-3 years before selling the house. There will be no "abrogation that allowed others to make off with the proceeds of 28 years of scrimping and saving for a comfortable retirement" in our situation, kids we will spend it all the next 20+ years!! We will travel around the grandkids as much as possible, or Face Time to fill in the gaps. For sure no more cold winters in our future!!

[ulvik]

dewey02 wrote:
To the OP:
I'm not really sure that anyone here (strangers to you) can answer your question. With the feelings of separation you have from your grandchildren, it seems you have made your choice. Why go out on the road and feel miserable? I don't think anyone here can change your mind or your attitude about how you want to be with your grandchildren on a frequent basis.

Many here have given their situations and some have posted their thoughts about the relationship you have with your children and grandchildren. Whether we think that such a close relationship is good or healthy is really not relevant. It is really up to you. If you have such separation anxiety, I don't think suggestions from others will change how you wish to relate to your grandchildren.

We all make choices in life and there are consequences (both good and bad) to those choices. I remember a cross-stitch I once saw that said the following: "Choose thy love; Love thy choice." Decide for yourselves what you want to do and be happy with it. I don't think anyone here can help you with that decision.

Thanks for the advise! I do not know how it could have been explained any better. Thanks again!

[dewey02]

To the OP:
I'm not really sure that anyone here (strangers to you) can answer your question. With the feelings of separation you have from your grandchildren, it seems you have made your choice. Why go out on the road and feel miserable? I don't think anyone here can change your mind or your attitude about how you want to be with your grandchildren on a frequent basis.

Many here have given their situations and some have posted their thoughts about the relationship you have with your children and grandchildren. Whether we think that such a close relationship is good or healthy is really not relevant. It is really up to you. If you have such separation anxiety, I don't think suggestions from others will change how you wish to relate to your grandchildren.

We all make choices in life and there are consequences (both good and bad) to those choices. I remember a cross-stitch I once saw that said the following: "Choose thy love; Love thy choice." Decide for yourselves what you want to do and be happy with it. I don't think anyone here can help you with that decision.