Etiquette and Courtesy for Tourists & Visitors

[magnusfide]

Thought I'd start this because of a conversation with a friend. Their main complaint is when tourists and visitors come up to them and start asking nosy questions about how they dress, etc. They live near a tourist town. They have a farm so they wear overalls or other non-trendy clothing.

So two I want to share.
1. Don't go up to people and ask them about their clothing or their religion.
2. Don't park the RV in spaces in small towns. Parking is limited enough for many of those towns. Find out where you can park your rig without taking up 2 or more parking spots.

Are there any guidelines you would like to share about how to behave as a tourist or visitor?

[wapiticountry]

It's not the questions, it's the judgmental way in which they are asked. Things like "you realize this isn't a real Pizza,the only real pizza is Chicago deep dish pizza?", "you know real barbeque is beef brisket, not pork?" "how can you people live without a Starbucks on the block?" "why would anyone live here when you have to drive 75 miles to the nearest Walmart?" "I can't believe you people voted for X don't you realize Y was a better choice?" all have an undertone that the questioner is right and you are somehow wrong.

[Deb_and_Ed_M]

Dick_B wrote:
one more thing about the Amish.
When I see all the TV ads to buy stuff I often think about the Amish who don't worry about whether they have the latest and greatest electronic gadget, cell phones, video games, largest and best TV, newest car, etc.

Electronic stuff? No - they have little interest. But they still put on a show, in subtle ways. My sister lived among them in LaGrange, IN and would point out signs of her neighbors' "status" like a high-stepping carriage horse, or a fancy harness; she said the women cherished having high-dollar cookware....LOL! None of this was ever flaunted - but still was on display. And none ever turned down the offer of a ride in a car or truck when offered.

My sis always said they were the best neighbors ever!!

[Dick_B]

one more thing about the Amish.
When I see all the TV ads to buy stuff I often think about the Amish who don't worry about whether they have the latest and greatest electronic gadget, cell phones, video games, largest and best TV, newest car, etc.
Having trouble limiting your childs electronic time? What if they didn't have ANY such devices. I know, in our world, that's far fetched but maybe.......

[2012Coleman]

My guidelines about how to behave as a tourist or visitor:

Talk to the locals! Ask where are the good places to eat.

Go places that are not tourist attractions - ask about local history.

Have fun!

Do no damage.

Spend your money - locals - well most locals, want you there to do the very things this latest RV.net etiquette lesson wants to tell you are taboo (based on the opinion of one person and no mention of exact places in the U.S. and Canada where this type of behavior is unwelcome).

[Dick_B]

and don't ever take a photo showing an Amish person's face because
`The Amish hold humility as a highly-cherished value and view pride as a threat to community harmony. Because items such as personal photographs can accentuate individuality and call attention to one's self, they are prohibited from the home. Moreover, the Amish believe that photographs in which they can be recognized violate the Biblical commandment, "Thou shalt not make unto thyself a graven image." They want to be remembered by the lives they lived and the examples they left, not by physical appearance.'

[Deb_and_Ed_M]

valhalla360 wrote:


Honestly, I suspect it's more about how the questions are asked as opposed to the actual questions.

I agree - I'm absolutely a nosy tourist 🙂 I love to learn about people/cultures/areas - it's why I travel the way I do (by RV). I guess I try to be respectfully curious? Haven't had anyone tell me to buzz off, yet 😉

[BarabooBob]

I shared a campsite with a couple of young German women many years ago. We talked for hours around the campfire. The campground was full so I asked them to join me. They had many questions about what it was like to ride motorcycle all over the US. I had an equal number of questions about their experiences traveling around the US and life in Germany. It was a great evening.

[Crowe]

Honestly, I suspect it's more about how the questions are asked as opposed to the actual questions.

I think that's a big part of it. If you feel you are a part of the Spanish Inquisition you are much more likely to be a little hostile rather than if someone politely asks "why do you wear that?".

[valhalla360]

Walaby wrote:
It never dawned on me to ever ask someone about the clothes you wear. I can't even imagine a conversation where that would come up, or why I would even care.

"Hey man.. why do y'all wear those overalls? Is it to keep the spaghetti sauce from staining your new t-shirts?" (kidding of course).

That's just weird...

Mike

Monks in Thailand wearing orange robes.

Germans at Oktoberfest wearing Lederhosen.

Masai warriors in Kenya wearing a red sash.

Lots of reasons to inquire about clothing choices. Now just an average midwest joe wearing overalls...a little less logic.

Assuming the OP is referring to Amish and just trying to avoid actually saying it...there are specific clothing choices they make, so it's reasonable if put to them politely to ask. We camp a lot in an area with a lot of Amish and while they aren't particularly outgoing, particularly with the English, they are polite and don't seem to mind having a conversation.

Honestly, I suspect it's more about how the questions are asked as opposed to the actual questions.

[FULLTIMEWANABE]

Deleted

[Walaby]

It never dawned on me to ever ask someone about the clothes you wear. I can't even imagine a conversation where that would come up, or why I would even care.

"Hey man.. why do y'all wear those overalls? Is it to keep the spaghetti sauce from staining your new t-shirts?" (kidding of course).

That's just weird...

Mike

[Old-Biscuit]

Man.....
If I hadn't been the nosey 'tourist' during our 7 yrs FTng I would not have gotten the 'inside scoop' that only the 'locals' know

Even when I was overseas I was that nosey tourist asking all kinds of questions, seeking information, gaining advice/knowledge

Respect should be key.
Give it and get it back

But their are some folks that just don't want to engage...they should quietly disengage

[magnusfide]

Old-Biscuit wrote:
If I didn't approach and engage in a conversation with the guy and his 2 girls in the horse drawn buggy I wouldn't have had a the great experience that occurred.
Learned a lot first hand about the Amish Culture and people.
even got invited to their farm which was a real blessing.

At CG right near Devils Tower, WY we came out one morning to find 6 Japanese girls sitting at our pic-nic table having their breakfast.
Instead of running them off we engaged with them. Found out they thought they were in a 'park' .....very apologetic about taking our space/table and were ready to pack up. We convinced them to stay, finish breakfast and enjoy their moment. Very interesting conversation.

Engaging with folks IS part of Life's Journey and can be beneficial to both.

I think the Amish are most likely accustomed to that. This friend and his neighbors feel as though tourists are treating them as objects or characters put on display instead of hard-working residents. Cultures differ. The picnic table incident happens often. I pretty sure my friend isn't addressing that.

Crowe wrote:
Please don't mistake curiosity for nosiness. If they are asking these questions it's quite possible they are trying to learn, possibly so they don't commit a faux pas. A polite "I'd rather not answer" should do the trick. That said...

1. Follow the rules. Period. This includes in RV parks. If the rule is no dogs then don't take your dogs, etc.
2. Agree about the parking issue. Have been too many places where rigs are just taking up too much space.
3. Behave. Don't exhibit bad behavior under the guise of "I'm a tourist".
4. Look up the word "respect" in the dictionary and practice it.

Crowe, good list of pointers.

There are places in the US and Canada where curiosity IS viewed as nosiness or rudeness. Asking personal questions about someone's clothing is considered rude in a number of places. Bringing up someone else's religion isn't considered polite either, in my friend's area or in a number of places. Very personal questions (clothing, religion, politics) are not a good way to interact in a community and with a people who are new to you.

[Moderator]

Good stories Old-Biscuit! 🙂

[Old-Biscuit]

If I didn't approach and engage in a conversation with the guy and his 2 girls in the horse drawn buggy I wouldn't have had a the great experience that occurred.
Learned a lot first hand about the Amish Culture and people.
even got invited to their farm which was a real blessing.

At CG right near Devils Tower, WY we came out one morning to find 6 Japanese girls sitting at our pic-nic table having their breakfast.
Instead of running them off we engaged with them. Found out they thought they were in a 'park' .....very apologetic about taking our space/table and were ready to pack up. We convinced them to stay, finish breakfast and enjoy their moment. Very interesting conversation.

Engaging with folks IS part of Life's Journey and can be beneficial to both.